One leg spread out on the sofa, one leg on the floor.
Perfectly still but for the typing fingers
In the future this may very well be a meditation position
Thoughts loop inside my head like a rollercoaster stuck forever on the same part of the track, uncaring about the physical laws it is breaking.
The trivial mixes with the serious.
One moment I try to grasp the direction my life is going
Another moment I think of a chocolate cake I dreamed last night.
In between, random memories flare up triggered by equally random glances at online articles
“I met him at a dinner party” says one celebrity of her celebrity husband.
Have I met anyone interesting at any of the dinner parties I’ve been?
How many parties have I been to?
Did I let any opportunity slip between the canapés?
I run the films again and again filling up the missing parts with décor out of movies and glossy magazines.
I wake up from my trance feeling vaguely angry. So many of the dinner parties I went to were shit. I feel cheated out of something even though I was not entitled to it in the first place.
But enough ridiculousness for one night.
I get up and break my attempt at achieving enlightenment through idleness
Only to find myself comically standing up with nowhere to move to.