I am with a friend at a place drinking red wine.There is no one else there. Christmas songs are blaring out of the speakers.The bottle is slowly turning empty in between talk of women,life and failure.

I am sitting in the dark. The TV has been switched off I don’t remember how long ago that was. In the dark time stands still. I switch on the screen on my phone, hold it up high and slowly turn it around, imagining that it is a lighthouse atop a cliff. Objects come out of the darkness like ghosts only to plunge back into it a moment later.

I am hearing my footsteps on the floor as I walk in the corridor.I am wearing a new pair of shoes and it seems to me that they make a sound all of their own, a sound I had never heard before,a note that was never struck before.

I am remembering myself giving a handwritten Christmas card to someone I loved as the first drops of rain started to fall from a Northern sky. It stands out so clearly from so much else, this one scene, as close to living inside a movie as my life ever got to be.

I am reading words on a screen. I reach inside my music folder and find the song. I place the earphones in my ears and let it explode in my head.

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